Nine days to a thinner me. I'm looking forward to my surgery, but have thought about the possibility of not waking up from the anesthesia. While I would worry about my family, particularly Houston, I would welcome a reprieve. Now, thats not to say I want one. Just that life has been hard for me. Even though I'm no longer depressed or struggling with major trials, I still wrestle to understand what it's all about. Why am I still here. Other than caring for my family, (a job I do joyfully and with deep gratitude), why am I still here? Why is Houston here? Beyond the occasional opportunity to share the gospel, beyond taking part in life's lessons, what is it really all about?
We received a body. We received Christ. We learned to live by faith. Oh, I just had a horrible thought. What if we are heading towards an event that will challenge our faith? Is there really a chance we could end up throwing in the towel like Mike and Beckie? That makes me want to cry. I would rather die than face that kind of failure.
Okay, now I'm not sure where I was going with this blog, I just hadn't written in a long time and started logging my thoughts. I think I just wanted to say that IF anything happens to me (and I don't think it will, but if it does) I have really enjoyed our relationship. I have always felt safe with you, and I have always felt loved. Thank you for that. And if I do die any time soon, whether it's on the operating table or under the wheels of a bus (perish the thought) know that you will have an angel running beside you on the treadmill, helping you and cheering you toward your weight goals. Thanks for being a great sister and a great example.
About me
- L.C. Lee
- L. C. Lee is my nom de plume. My real name is Linda Carrillo. I live in Texas with my husband and three of my four children. I enjoy writing, reading and baking. My favorite study du jour is the prophet Enoch from the book of Moses, the Lost Books of Eden from the Apocrypha, and giants. Hmm, I feel a novel coming on...
Everything Old
available at mixbook.com
THRIVE
1 comments:
I'm sure you will come through the surgery just fine. I still think it's too close to the date of the sisters weekend and am not sure you will have recovered enough to really enjoy yourself, but I'm sure you have researched it more than me and feel you know what you're doing.
The country is coming to a major change. You will need to teach your children the constitution and the truth about the founding fathers and that God was the maker of the Constitution because they are not going to learn any of that in school. They are the ones that are going to hold it up for nations to see. So you are still needed.
It's funny that you mention running beside me on the treadmill because most of the time that I spend on the treadmill is spent daydreaming. And you usually are there right beside me while we exercise together. And by the way, we have a GREAT time talking and laughing. It's easy to laugh and exercise at the same time when it's all in your head. :)
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